why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Randomize
