Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Randomize
