so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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