I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
