Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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