is your mom at the bar?
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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