Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
