I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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