Soap is not a condiment
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
