i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
being pregnant is like rehab
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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