Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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