we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
