That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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