we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
