Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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