I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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