I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
