My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
