no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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