wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We're too hungover to prance.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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