you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
