Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Just high enough for therapy.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
