Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
