I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
