Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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