I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
The adults are the big ones right?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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