I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
