i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
