NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
