YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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