What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
