and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
