watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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