His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize