Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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