...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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