You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
