i can't believe i had my finger in that
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
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