Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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