I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
