why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Can I color on your dick again?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize
