U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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