We won't sleep together?
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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