Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
