i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
