that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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