all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
