Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Sorry my hands just texted you
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
