Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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