i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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